I joined a storytelling club eight years ago. Back then, I often paused during my speeches and received compliments for it. In reality, I paused because I forgot my lines and needed a moment to refresh my memory. Over time, I discovered the true power of a well-placed pause. It not only helps eliminate filler words, but also gives both the speaker and the audience a moment to reflect and think.
My husband and I have had a struggle lately. He is hurting due to my recent ADHD and autism diagnoses. In a way he is mourning. Unfortunately, it has shown up with arguments. I keep reminding myself to do this. To take a breath before responding. To take a long pause. Sadly that usually comes after the fact. I find this to be quite difficult when I feel criticized and judged by him. I seem to be instantly triggered into defense mode. I will keep trying though. And I will continue to meditate and pray for peace in my heart so as to not be triggered and to see his pain.
I’m a talker—probably always will be. I can keep going long after the eyes around me have glazed over. But learning MI has been a game changer—it’s teaching me when to temper that part of myself.
Now, I love the pause.
A well-timed pause after a reflection gives clients space to breathe, absorb, and think before speaking. I’ve had clients say, “I’ve never thought about it like that.”
Their insights come from their own inner wisdom—surfacing when I stop filling the silence. Making time for a pause might be the greatest gift I offer.
Thank you, Kimberly. I love the way you framed silence as a therapeutic communication skill—what a powerful reminder. When you described it as a gift that allows someone to process and respond more deeply, I could really relate. Your words clearly highlight how silence, when paired with a reflection, becomes something more than a pause—it becomes healing.
As a Brainspotting practitioner, we were taught to frequently consider the acronym WAIT: Why am I talking? It's so easy to fill space within sessions and conversations, but how often do we assess whether each word is enriching the conversation (and the client's process) versus just filling space and time. I'm often pleasantly surprised by what follows when I just sit quietly for a bit and let the client's thoughts and emotions bubble to the surface. Thanks for the reminder!
Thank you, Kimberly Williams, for today’s Pause. I painted that word on canvas and stuck it to my fridge—it even made my 2024 vision board.
Pause isn’t easy. Pause is no walk in the park. It’s uncomfortable, inconvenient, and exactly what I need. I’ve made the promise to myself to pause daily again and again. I mess it up, forget, rush past it. And I’ll say it now: I believe in the quiet moment to reset, calibrate, relax and give myself a chance to pause in my personal and professional life
Chatoné, you are so dedicated to your New Year’s resolution and so humbling to be here with you. Your tenacity and determination to continue is admirable! Thank you for this one.
I joined a storytelling club eight years ago. Back then, I often paused during my speeches and received compliments for it. In reality, I paused because I forgot my lines and needed a moment to refresh my memory. Over time, I discovered the true power of a well-placed pause. It not only helps eliminate filler words, but also gives both the speaker and the audience a moment to reflect and think.
Thanks Kimberly. Such a great reminder… and not an easy one for me. I appreciate the reminder so much. I will keep this prompt in the back of my mind!
My husband and I have had a struggle lately. He is hurting due to my recent ADHD and autism diagnoses. In a way he is mourning. Unfortunately, it has shown up with arguments. I keep reminding myself to do this. To take a breath before responding. To take a long pause. Sadly that usually comes after the fact. I find this to be quite difficult when I feel criticized and judged by him. I seem to be instantly triggered into defense mode. I will keep trying though. And I will continue to meditate and pray for peace in my heart so as to not be triggered and to see his pain.
Thank you Kimberly for the prompt. Pause and listen is definitely a gift you could give to the person in front of you.
I’m a talker—probably always will be. I can keep going long after the eyes around me have glazed over. But learning MI has been a game changer—it’s teaching me when to temper that part of myself.
Now, I love the pause.
A well-timed pause after a reflection gives clients space to breathe, absorb, and think before speaking. I’ve had clients say, “I’ve never thought about it like that.”
Their insights come from their own inner wisdom—surfacing when I stop filling the silence. Making time for a pause might be the greatest gift I offer.
Talking is a gift you've identified, too. Just one you want to use when in the moment it's most useful. It takes deep strength to hold back.
I love the self-acceptance in "probably always will be"!
Thank you, Kimberly. I love the way you framed silence as a therapeutic communication skill—what a powerful reminder. When you described it as a gift that allows someone to process and respond more deeply, I could really relate. Your words clearly highlight how silence, when paired with a reflection, becomes something more than a pause—it becomes healing.
As a Brainspotting practitioner, we were taught to frequently consider the acronym WAIT: Why am I talking? It's so easy to fill space within sessions and conversations, but how often do we assess whether each word is enriching the conversation (and the client's process) versus just filling space and time. I'm often pleasantly surprised by what follows when I just sit quietly for a bit and let the client's thoughts and emotions bubble to the surface. Thanks for the reminder!
Thanks Shanen for the acronym, such a playful way to remind myself to pause and listen.
Thanks for WAIT ✨
Thank you, Kimberly Williams, for today’s Pause. I painted that word on canvas and stuck it to my fridge—it even made my 2024 vision board.
Pause isn’t easy. Pause is no walk in the park. It’s uncomfortable, inconvenient, and exactly what I need. I’ve made the promise to myself to pause daily again and again. I mess it up, forget, rush past it. And I’ll say it now: I believe in the quiet moment to reset, calibrate, relax and give myself a chance to pause in my personal and professional life
My new years resolution for the past three years has been to say less! In life and therapy. Love this reminder.
Chatoné, you are so dedicated to your New Year’s resolution and so humbling to be here with you. Your tenacity and determination to continue is admirable! Thank you for this one.